The road ahead

Each time i step on an out-station bus; each time i sit down on its couch; each time i wait eagerly for the bus to start moving, I will start thinking and contemplating how my journey in life has changed and moved on. And above all, i want to thank my friends who somehow and somewhere have walked together with me in my life.

Oh, my memories stepped back in time, to the time when i first boarded my first out-station bus from Kuala Lumpur to Terengganu in 2003. That's the first time I went travelling alone to a place i'd never been before. To a place so foreign in culture, language and race. And who's there to guide me? My friends.

My first trip in Malaysia to Terengganu.

Standing (left-right): Me, Elyas, Mustaffa's mum, Daniel.

Sitting (left-right): Christie, Ummi, Hanijoe

Then, in Australia, i learned to travel by plane and train. Yet, travelling was never easy as understanding their culture, and language could be a challenge. Yet, I embraced this challenge to go to places i know as well as places i don't know. 'Places i know' is where i have companions and friends travelling with me, while 'places i don't know' is where i travelled as a lone traveller, no partner and friends.

Inevitably, the feeling of anxiety and fear sanked in each time i wanted to make a decision. It is like a tussle of both positive feeling and negative feeling. To go or not to go? What if i get lost? What if i get myself into trouble? What is lie ahead of me? What has my life got to offer me?

Knowing that life is made worthwhile only when we try it and experience it <on the other hand, certain learning from people's experience can be more meaningful than one experiences it himself>, i decided to put all my worries behind, believing that life has really got something to offer me to learn.

My first trip as a lone traveller to Bundaberg: that's Daniel from Germany.

For example, the recent travel to Penang opened my eyes to two big lessons in life: the importance of friendship, giving than takingn. Initially, it was my 'dream' idea to have a road trip up north (ipoh-Penang-Kedah-Perlis) and down east south (Perlis-Kelantan-Terengganu-Pahang-KL) during this 1-week break. However, the dream did not come true when some unavoidable obstacles came along our ways. So, Plan B - go up Penang and down Ipoh.

Lesson 1 - Friendship

My coolest junior Ashes lives in Penang. I thought it would be a pleasant idea to see what's available in Penang since everyone has been saying it's food is delicious whatsoever. And so, we went up north on Saturday night bus. What seemed to be a simple journey to Penang turned challenging when we realized that we missed the Juru station (Penang mainland) for disembarkation.

It was 2 in the morning on the island of Penang, and we were stranded on the island. The blood-sucking taxi driver intended to charge us RM70 to get us to the mainland in which we rejected. Thinking that Penang is just a small island, i suggested that we could walk to the city and see what's there. He did not agree, nor did he disagree.

He had a better idea=walk across the Penang bridge . Wow what a BRILLIANT idea! Nooooooo... i didn't exactly know why i said that, but it turned out to be the wise decision. The minute after i cancelled his brilliant plan, it started to rain heavily in Penang!!!

"It's hard to see rain in Penang, you know. But once it did, it is a blessing" Ashes said.
"So it's a blessing for me from Penang is it now?" i replied him sarcastically. And we both laughed.

We managed to run for a shelter at one of the residents house there. It was 3 in the morning and we were still stranded on the island, with our shirt and bodies drenched with rainwater. What a pleasant welcome from Penang.

To get us out of the island, I was out of idea than to scroll down my contact list, searching for my friends who are in USM. Those who answered were in Kuching already while those who didn't i believe it's a little too late to call.

The moment when i thought about who to call and should i call was the moment when i realized that i had done little to keep in touch with them, especially this year round when i came back from Australia. Yet, those who answered my phone that night had really been supportive of me by giving me contacts of those in USM.

Anywhere, thanks to Julian, Ashes' friend who came all the way from the mainland and his working shift to bring us back home. There, i see how important a friendship can be, even if it is the slightest smallest friendship people build. We can never take for granted that we don't need others in our life, cos we'll never know when will be the next time we call for their help or they're the only ones who can offer us help.

Lesson 2 - To give than take

Giving probably is the hardest thing that i will ever do in my life, mostly because it involves financial capability and a desire to give. And i suck in these big time.

For years, i have used examples from my friends to improve my skill of giving. One example is taken from my close friend, Elyas who has shown big hearts in giving over the years. What's more valuable is him teaching me how to be like one.

He said sometimes we human tend to forget what others have done for us, intentionally or unintentionally. Some may do it unintentionally as they have difficulty in expressing their appreciation: shy and not used to give. What's important is that we must give with an open heart without having doubt over our giving. Unless we learn to give freely, we will not be happy with our giving, and think of what returns.

My journey to Penang taught me this lesson. You know, being a male in the Indian culture, you are not obliged to do house chores - i.e. cooking, washing dishes, cleaning and whatnot - as compared to females. Maybe our new generation has called for a more equal share of work between sexes at home, but what remains apparent is that females in some families are still the group taking charge of house.

Being one of the 'family' members in Ashes' home, I was reminded of certain courtesy and manners i had to do, like offering a hand to help than waiting for food to be served. Yet, it was difficult at first as they thought that a guest must be served like a guest, insisting that I should be out there watching tv than being in the kitchen. Likewise, after dinner, they would insist me to leave my dishes for his sister to wash.

The next few days, i made a mind to get any small opportunities to wash dishes, like upon finishing my breakfast. His sister insisted that it was her job washing the dish, but i simply smiled and replied, 'it's k. it's my dishes, so i will wash up myself.' That action followed.

In my heart, i felt pleased as at least i am doing something to give to the family. I know it's just a small thing did, but believe me, even with this small thing, the family appreciated my contribution. I couldn't feel more belonged and happier.

Before i left yesterday, aunty's words struck me greatly. As i invited her and her family to come over to Sibu, she thanked me and said, 'Now we have a foster family there already'. And I agreed.

See, lesson 2: It oftens pays to give than take. I once read one quote, people don't really remember how fast we do, they remember how well we do.

That's Ashwin's family (from left-right): Ashwin, Ashwin's mummy, Ashwin's sister, and me

The road ahead
You see, God promises us a life with purpose and meaning. And this is what i meant. He is so great that He sent people of different races, religions and colours to guide me. With this, i can't be more thankful of what He has given me: my friends and new unknown people in my life to guide me.

Each travelling and journey promises a life experience and learning. Like how Robert Kiyosaki once wrote, "Life is the best teacher of all... and each push is life saying 'WAKE UP. There's something I want you to learn.'"

And, as nicely put by one of my growing-wise friend,

Many a times i do not know what lies before for me

Sometimes i dun even know where i am heading to

I have fears and doubts

But one thing i know:

He is with me and will guide my ways(Isaiah 41:10)

Thank you Lord.